Sunday, August 5, 2012

Stretching and other spiritual exercises.

So I've finished my internship and it was wonderful, but now, I'm jobless and homeless.  My lease ran out noon on July 30 and I was planning to stay one night at my friends' in Erie then head back home to Georgia because I have no home, no job, and no money.  Well, the Lord had other plans for me.  I know I mentioned in my previous post that I knew I was in the right place...well, I still know that, and I knew that when I was planning on leaving, but it's hard to live without money or a place of residence.  I guess I could have slept in my car, but it gets kinda uncomfortable when it's pack so tight I can't see out the back and I'd be sleeping sitting straight up! :) 

So I was planning to leave and continue my job hunting back home, thinking I'd come back if I found a job.  Well, the Friday before I was gonna leave, I get a call from a recruiter and I figured it wouldn't hurt to meet with him, so we scheduled for Monday afternoon.  Sunday I met a guy in my ward when he came to pick up my bed frame (I was getting rid of all my furniture), and we started talking about my job situation and he said he had a couple contacts he would get in touch with and let me know if they had any openings the next day.  My plan was still to leave Tuesday morning for Chesnye's unless something sounded promising.

Monday I meet with the recruiter, and it was really good, but I left still unsure about what to do, as it was more of an intro meeting than anything else and he wanted to have a follow-up meeting the following week.  So I meet up with my friends for FHE and talk things over with them a bit and they're more than gracious in saying I can stay with them for longer if I need to.  I'm following them back to their place from the park we were playing "corn hole" (it's the Colorado name for bean bag toss), I made the decision to stay for at least a week and I felt calm and peaceful as soon as I made that decision.  I hadn't heard from the guy from church yet, so I called him and left a message with his son.  He called me back later that night saying he had not gotten in touch with his contacts.  I told him I was staying at least for a week and he said he'd keep trying.  He's been great in sending me information about job openings he's come across.

Ironically, the day after I move out of the area, I get a phone call, it's from another guy in my ward who says he's my home teacher! :) I fill him in on my situation and he's apologetic he hasn't called earlier, but supportive and offers to help in any way he can.  I tell him I'll let him know.  So all last week I've been job hunting and I have had a phone interview for a part-time job as an Office Manager for a maid service company, but I won't know if I made the face-to-face interview until tomorrow or Tuesday.  And as it has nothing to do with my major, the guy expressed concern about me leaving it after a short while if I found a full-time position in my field, which I would do (though I didn't tell him that!), but at this point I'm not sure when that will happen.  However, if I get a face-to-face, I'm going to broach the idea of starting a wellness program with his employees and that will be more motivation for me to stay.  I also have a potential job opening at the company that does the City of Boulder's Wellness Program, but I'm waiting to hear when it will be posted.  I'm excited about that one as it's more of an entry level position and most of my problem has been lacking in management/supervisory experience, or wellness/fitness field experience period. 

And my friends have been wonderful, but I don't want to impose on them more than I have to and they're about to start finishing out their basement, which means I'd have to crash in their office upstairs and have no space to myself whatsoever.  My cousins live in Colorado Springs and I know they'd be more than happy to let me stay there also, but they have twice as many kids and half as much space, though I would have an actual bedroom and bathroom to myself (unless they have company staying with them).  And they're two hours away from this area which is where all my contacts are at.  But I can travel up here for interviews at the least and if I got a job up here, I could stay with my friends here or beg someone in Boulder Ward to put me up for a bit till I earn enough to get an apartment.

So that brings us to today.  I went to Boulder Ward because I wanted to follow up with that one guy and talk to my home teacher about getting a blessing for guidance in this whole endeavor, though I didn't know my home teacher by sight, luckily though he got up and bore his testimony and introduced himself, so I found him after sacrament and talked to him about it and we set up a time after church and he said he'd get his companion too.  I also talked with the other guy who had been out of town the end of this past week, but he said he'd follow up with his contacts tomorrow and Tuesday and he got my email to forward me job openings he was on the list for and he introduced me to the employment specialist, and I spoke with him for a few minutes and that was good.

So now I have to backtrack to last Sunday.  I met a couple who had just moved into the ward that day and offered them my desk and kitchen table.  Ironically, her name is Anneli (pronounced the same as my sister AnnaLea) and his name is Gary (the same as my dad's).  They came over the next morning to pick up the furniture and helped me pack my car, which was fantastic.  Anneli was looking for a job too and Gary was starting grad school at CU.  So I picked up Anneli one day to go to Boulder's Employment office so we both could see what it was about.  They're just graduated from BYU, married a couple years, but they're great.  Then today, I'm leaving Relief Society and they're standing outside talking to someone and Gary asked me my last name. I told him and he said he thought he was my home teacher! So that was nice that I had already become friends with them and he's one of my home teachers and he did assist in the blessing I had requested.

I wasn't expecting anything specific, but I did get a feeling of peace and calmness that everything would work out, but because of something that was said it might not be in the near future, but I would be taken care of.  Well, I wasn't too ecstatic about that thought, but with everything that was said in church today with that, I know this is a period of intense stretching for me.  I don't know where I'm going to end up, how it's going to happen, or when it'll all come together, but I do know that it will.  And I still feel that this is the place for me to be right now.  Don't know where I'm going to be living and I sure would like to get a semi-permanent place so I can unload my car, but I'll go where the Lord wants me to go and do what He wants me to do, or the best that I'm able.  I definitely miss my family right now and I've had offers from Chesnye in Kansas City, MO and another friend in TX to come and live with them for a time, which I would consider except for the conviction and confirmations I've received that I need to be here.

It's hard for me to be dependent on other people, I feel helpless, and I was crying on the phone to my mom today and I told her I was allergic to homelessness and joblessness! And it's not something Claritin can help!  But we were talking in Sunday School today about how we get the opportunity to grow and it can be hardship sometimes, and a friend posted the story about how we're like a house the Lord is remodeling and we thought we were a cottage, but He's changing us into a palace, and He's knocking out walls, and building turrets and it's painful!  I know what I'm going through is not nearly as difficult as some people I know, but they are much stronger than me, and I'm on my own, single, and with no immediate family and no close, close friends that I know would never resent me crashing at their place indefinitely.  Not that I think my friends here think that, but I'm just not as close to them as I am with some people and I don't make those kind of friendships easily.

But life will go on and it will get better and I will learn and grow and look back on this time and laugh at myself for struggling like I am. I thank the Lord I have His gospel in my life, and though I'm single I can still receive priesthood blessings from worthy brethren, and though I'm not as close to them as I'd like, for friends don't hesitate to put me up for a period of time and for wonderful family that loves me and supports me in any way they can, even if they want me back home with them!

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